Cleaning the Fan

You've heard the vulgar expression about the damage caused upon the innocent, unassuming fan that happened to be present during an argument, and the "filth" that bears witness to it.  You know the one: that one about the mess hitting the fan.

As a Christian online writer, I struggle with not wanting to be so rich in "this is how to do it right" that I come across as only presenting a seemingly phoney-baloney approach to Christianity or to the real world.  I don't want to seem so patient, right, or holy that I'm unapproachable and my message is unrelatable.  This blog, within that line of thought, was created with the intention of sharing a collection of introspection, joy, wonder and thanksgiving that God continually cultivates in my spirit.

However, with all of that said, I am human.  I get angry, frustrated, sad, selfish, jealous, hurt and depressed.  I am, sometimes, an emotional mess.

One of my faults (embarassingly) is that, sometimes, I don't hear what my man is telling me, or I don't understand his approach to leading me and our family (which, admittedly, is amazing, and always for our good and benefit, even when I sometimes don't understand how it will work for that end).  I challenge him instead of helping him.  Instead of providing counsel, discussion and reflection, I offer sarcasm, indignity, and disrespect.  Thankfully, I don't do this often, but I am convicted when I do, and afterward, am continually propelled forward to reconcile and gain better insight into preventing it from happening again.

In short, sometimes, as much as I absolutely and deeply adore my husband, I get our fan dirty.

And now, I want to share with you how I clean it.

1. I remember that lovely gentleness that God placed in my spirit.  I beckon it.  I ask God to refresh it and bring it back into my reach.

That may sound like rubbish to you, but I've experienced the reality of it, and that is often enough to alter my path and lead me back to where I want to be (in alignment with my man and with God).

2.If that isn't enough, I have a special "fan cleaning kit".
Wanna peek inside?

Holy Bible

1. The Bible has lots to say about marriage, husbands and wives.  Just search "husband, husbands, marriage, wife, or love.



2. The Bible teaches me about the Holy Spirit, Who will speak into my spirit and will guide me into the full truth (John 16:13-15).

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3. One of my favorite books is "The Love Dare".  It goes along with the movie "Fireproof".  It challenges you, for 40 days, to stretch outside of your comfort, and think outside of your current feelings, and offer love to your spouse.

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4. I just love books (and blogs, radio stations, speakers) like this, from authors who can just be frank and tell me like it is. 

4. Asking for help.  Don't stay alone with the problem, because it is when we are alone that we become tempted (Genesis 3:4, Ecclesiastes 4:12).  Asking for help includes prayer, telling your husband that you are searching for a change in your spirit...it includes calling a trusted, responsible friend, mentor, or a leader in your church.  It is petitioning for someone else to help you lift it.  I think, at some time in our marriage, we all need to seek outside help. 

All of our fans get dirty.  

Maybe this very blog post is an answer to a call on your heart? 

So there you go.  You have a great start to cleaning your fan.  I hope it blesses you and your marriage!